How I Became an Agented Author

It’d be easy to not write this blog post because part of me is stupid-scarred from years of rejections and doesn’t want to rehash it publicly. But the thing is, these “How I Got My Agent” posts gave me life as a querying author and it’s only right that I return the favor. Great big fucking circle of the writerly life and all, right?

So, I’ll tuck my pride and do the thing. Warning: this post is long because my journey was long.

Here’s the deal, guys. A lot of you know me. I’ve been around twitter since December of 2014, I think? Which is right about the time I finished my first book.

It wasn’t a very good book. The concept was cool, the characters were some of my best and the dialogue was on point. But the story line was riddled with plot holes and that was just the beginning of the problems. No one had read my book besides my family. I worried a lot about grammar, but then sent it out never even realizing it was single spaced. SINGLE SPACED YOU GUYS.

I hopped on to Writers Digest, took down the first ten names of brand new agents accepting SFF and away they went. My query letter was lengthy, my first pages featured a girl getting ready for school and LOOKING IN THE MIRROR and my chapter titles featured grunge songs from the 90s.

Despite this, I had a few requests. Not many… maybe 4 total in 50 queries? All of them were NO’s. “Nice writing, but not ready.” I can’t tell you stats because I didn’t even keep track of them.

I half-heartedly sought beta readers. I hadn’t even heard of a CP (critique partner) at this point. THAT’S how green I was. I scored a few, but found I did a lot of work for very little in return. I tried to join an online writing community, but that was a lot of the same. Then one day, I just happened across a tweet looking for an MS swap. I jumped into my DMs so fast, you’d think I KNEW this tweet would change my life.

Because it did. It’s how I met Karen McManus and how we ended up reading each other’s terrible trilogies and while the books were NO GOOD, we realized that as writers, we weren’t that bad. So we became clueless CP’s, fumbling around together. There was a lot of “I know they say NOT to start in front of a mirror, BUT…” and “Sure, dystopians are supposedly out of fashion, but MINE’S DIFFERENT…”

Anyways, I wrote another book during nanowrimo just to prove to myself that I could write something besides the ill-fated trilogy. A contemporary fantasy about the daughter of tree spirits. It was cute, likeable, snarky and fun. It got zero love.

Okay, maybe not zero. I think I sent out 20 queries and got back 1 partial request that turned into a rejection.  A pretty traumatic thing happened in my family at the same time, and I just gave up on my happy little tree sprites. Shelved. I wrote the book to prove I could and I did. Moving on.

During this time, I was in and out of hospital waiting rooms and doctor’s offices and dark places in my mind and the idea came to me to write a contemporary YA about the sibling of a popular girl who drives her car off a cliff. It was really sort of autobiographical, as I was (in my youth) a teen who battled with depression and suicidal thoughts. I poured my soul into this book. After just pages, my CPs would write back THIS IS THE BOOK. I didn’t want to think it, but I hoped. Afterall, my guts were inside that book.

I sent it out and the response was quick! Full requests rolled in one after another. My CPs were right! This was it! I entered it into pitch contests and had ten agents ask for a query. I was on fire!

Until I wasn’t. Weeks went by and I’d heard nothing and then the gradual step asides. It wasn’t clicking with agents. It was too religious. They didn’t get the teen’s anger. The dancing was lovely, but the rest….

I gained more CPs and they were lifesavers. They loved the book and they loved me. They wouldn’t let me give up on my dream or the book. They’d entered pitchwars and convinced me to do the same. But, they got in and I didn’t. All of my CP’s were either IN pitchwars or mentors. It was a dark time for this writer. I cried my eyes out and sent out more (revenge) queries. So many queries. I think my final number for this particular book was 86 queries. Let me say that again: Eighty-six.

Barely any requests came through, though. The election was looming in the US and let’s face facts: No one wants to read a sad story when they’re sad. And everyone was/is sad.

Nanowrimo time came again and I decided the best way to beat the blues was to write something new. Something different than I’d ever written before. I’d seen a documentary on the Carter family on Netflix and was amazed to learn that while basically everyone in the world knew who Johnny Cash was, but he was star struck by June Carter and her famous family. THEY were the celebrities to him.

A little seed sprouted in my brain. What if I wrote about country music? What if I wrote a love story? WHAT IF MY FEMALE LEAD WAS THE LEGENDARY ONE? The pitch came first. You guys, I HATE writing pitches and it came first. The concept was born and the book flew out of me from there. I always binge write. Fly by the seat of my pants for two months until the words are all spent. My husband just knows the dishes wont get done and I won’t remember anything he says and I will walk around with random dirty kid socks in my back pocket in public until I’m done with my draft.

I finished it and sent it CPs. They didn’t dare tell me this one was The Book. They knew I’d been burned before. I revised and revised and it was ready to query but I froze. There is this very short period of grace between finishing and querying where you are filled with all sorts of incredible HOPE. It’s this fragile, completely delicate spun sugar sort of time. Once that first rejection rolls in, it’s over. I could live in that time. Seriously. Roll in it forever.

But #pitmad came up again and I’d promised myself I would pitch it. I was about to start a full time sub job at an elementary school and needed to get the queries out before I lost my nerve. So I pitched. I got favorites. Lots of them. I mailed queries, and got requests. Five of them within twenty-four hours. From good agents.

But still, I couldn’t let myself hope again. Eventually I received three very quick R&R’s. All with very different visions. No rejections, but no takers either. My CPs said to keep going. I compiled the agent’s suggestions and on my day off, added 4k of backstory. Then I queried again.

A full request in less than 6 minutes. Okay. Keep going.

I sent two more. And two more. I’d get a quick no, and I’d send two more. Another request and another. My CPs (mostly Annette Christie- biggest cheerleader ever) said QUERY MORE. So I did. I sent out fifteen.

Over the next week, I had 7 more requests. No rejections. WHAT IS HAPPENING.

Then I wait. Another week passes with a very kind and encouraging rejection. Memorial Day comes and I leave for Illinois and tell my family over wine that I’m not sure if I feel hopeful or just burned from the last experience. I get back to Michigan and pack for Boston. I fly out the next morning for Karen McManus’ book debut party. Remember her? How could you forget? We started this crazy journey together. I’m checking my phone on my way out the door to dinner with my other CP, the marvelous Jenny Howe, before the big debut party…. when I see it.

The Email. You know how gmail only shows you a few words? I saw the word LOVED in all caps and started shaking so bad I couldn’t click for more. It was an agent and she wanted to talk to me.

The rest is a whirlwind. We spoke and clicked right away. I nudged all the other agents with my full (and queries) and fielded a few more requests and to my shock, ALL asked to still read. I had more offers and they were beyond gracious and lovely, but in the end I stuck with my first choice. There’s something to be said for the one who fishes you out of the slush and the things she said about my book just STUCK in my brain and wouldn’t let go. Kate McKean offered and I accepted and I won’t be looking back.

I sent 46 queries for YOU’D BE MINE over two months. I received 15 full requests and 3 R&Rs.

I entered every pitch contest under the sun during those three years. The only one I ever got in to was #pg70pit, which will always hold a special place in my heart, even though the rest of the MS was a mess. That said, twitter and twitter contests are where I found my people. In the three years I’ve been doing this, ALL my CPs have found agents. One has a very successful book deal and three are on or about to be on submission. This is real life. It does happen. It takes time, but it happens.

Stick with it, kids. Thanks for all the love and kindness.

Erin